Directions to My Aunt’s House (as Dictated by my Mother)

Go towards Blair, and go over the 401. Get on the 401, and keep going past where you used to get off for Andrea’s house. Take the next exit (I can’t remember what it’s called) but the NEXT one is Stratford, so don’t get off there.

Once you’re off the highway, turn left and go past where the old Olympia restaurant used to be. I wonder what happened to that old man.

Continue past the old Supercentre and that school that Andrea’s brother used to go to for High School. (How come he went to Catholic school, but his sister didn’t?)

Keep going past where the Orthodontist was when you were 12, and where we had to go to get that bloodwork done that one time the lab was closed at our doctor’s. You should be getting closer to the University now.

When you see the Electrical Transformer station, get ready, because your turn is on the left (wasn’t this the same turn we took to go to that birthday party for Vanessa?)

Turn left where it says “Beachwood” and keep going straight. It looks like a fork (Dad: IT IS A FORK. GO RIGHT) But it’s NOT a fork. Just don’t go left.

They’re at the end of the cul-de-sac. I don’t remember the number, but he drives a black Lexus. Sometimes they have a red bow on their door. 

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